Be More with Less

simplicity is love

5 Simple Strategies for When You are Insecure

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"The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind the scenes with everyone else's highlight reel." - Steve Furtick

Insecurity is a part of my daily life. It doesn’t usually get in the way, but it is ever-present. Sometimes it’s over something silly like trying a new recipe, or something bigger like sharing my work or waiting for test results.

I’ve had a lot of practice, so it usually just hums along in the background, but I turn to these strategies when I need a little help.

If you struggle with insecurity, I hope these simple strategies will help.

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5 simple strategies to use when you are insecure

1. Take action.
Do it anyway, even when you feel insecure. Action shuts insecurity down and strengthens your resolve for the next time you have to rise above that tiny voice that says you aren’t good enough.

2. Ask for help.
You need people in your corner/circle/tribe/community to lift you up, talk you down, and to support and guide you. Be vulnerable and let people in.

3. Don’t compare.
Constantly comparing and competing is exhausting and usually the things we try to measure up to aren’t real. They are filtered, photoshopped and other people’s highlight reels. Instead, do what feels best for you. The freedom you feel from being you will only elevate your actions and intentions.

4. Remember this is temporary.
I can correct typos, delete videos, remove blog posts, step back, or out, or whatever I need to do. And, attention is fleeting. There is always room for change, new direction and moving forward. Think back to what you were feeling insecure about 6 months ago and you probably won’t remember why. This too shall pass.

5. Take a walk.
When you can’t push through or rise above, walk away. Get in the woods, or out in your city and walk out the fear and the insecurity. Removing yourself from the immediate danger gives everything perspective. Come back in and try again.

Insecurity doesn’t make you weak. It makes you human.

Comments

  1. Hi Courtney,

    I watched the video and love that it’s totally you and does not have the bells and whistles I’ve seen in other promotions. Nothing scares me more than pop up screens! 😉

    I have been feeling a bit insecure as of late. The good health I have had since 2008 has had a little set back, and it seems I’m suffering with some of the same symptoms I had from 2006 – 2008 after I took Levaquin. My symptoms are very similar to those of other conditions, and I have many well-meaning people telling me what they think it is. I am open to the possibility it may be something else, but I feel secure in that I got over it the first time and will this time. What helps me is like your #4 above – remembering this is temporary. I’m not going to feel exactly like this forever, so I have to take action (#1) like getting previous MRI reports (even if it means FIVE phone calls!) and take walks (#5) when I can. And, like I did yesterday, when I have to cancel plans with a friend, I don’t feel guilty. I just remember that I have to take care of me first before I can be of any use to others. Thank you for sharing your stories with us. I hope all your tests came back great.

    • Thank you Tammy. This is the time to be selfish, take care of yourself, and learn how you can feel better. Sorry you are going through that, but I know you’ve got this. xo

  2. This really spoke to me, Courtney: “You need people in your corner/circle/tribe/community to lift you up, talk you down, and to support and guide you. Be vulnerable and let people in.”

    I always love your webinars because you are you and that’s perfect for me!

    • Sandra, You know I’m in your corner! Thanks for your kind words. I love webinaring with you.

  3. You did fine, Courtney. The first video I ever created was terrible because I was still learning my software. Personally, being confident with your tools means everything. That and understanding your video creation process. Once your importing and editing knowledge becomes second nature your videos turn out great. But that means practice. We have to practice regularly, put the project down and come back it to it after our head clears. And one of the biggest video rules for me hits on the topic of your blog; being more with less. As soon as I narrowed my video creation process down to using only several types of transitions and a few other features I was able to plan my message more accurately. Also- if you truly want feedback I’ll tell you it’s okay to blink your eyes more. I’m guilty of staring the camera down myself. Seriously. Love the blog. = )

  4. Hi Courtney – Wow, your talent at speaking on-camera on the fly without a script is awesome. Isn’t it funny that in being yourself you were a better version of yourself?
    I love your blog. Thank you for sharing your wisdom and journey.
    Ann

    • Thanks Ann. I’ve decided video making is all about not taking things too seriously. 😉

  5. Thanks, Courtney, for being just real. Gives us permission to believe that our own “real” can be awesome, too. Looking forward to the webinar if I can work with my schedule!

  6. Normally I find your posts really insightful but I felt this one for more for you to get reassurance. I haven’t watched the video, I’m sure it’s fine.
    The title of your post today grabbed my attention as I’m struggling with insecurity at the moment. I would have gained more if your post had been more general in nature. More insecurity would not benefit from someone looking at the events that made me this way.
    In my situation, only talk to a friend and take walk can help me.
    I understand you were talking about your specific situation at the time but just saying more general comments on how to deal with insecurity would have been more beneficial for me.
    I also know you’re not a trained psychologist so maybe I’m asking too much 🙂
    Happy days x

    • Hi Karen, We can all use reassurance but that wasn’t my intention for this post. I usually try to find lessons in my own experience and insecurity was was on my mind. I’m glad that 2 of the 5 recommendations might be helpful for you.

  7. Hi Courtney,
    Really enjoyed your unrehearsed video. I think that I pick up ideas from your experiences, so, what you went through facing your insecurities and how you chose to deal with them is very relevant to me. Thank you.

  8. Courtney, I am soaking in your beautiful writing and can’t wait for the upcoming webinar. Your honest sharing of your MS diagnosis and touching on how it affects your life without allowing it to define your life is inspiring and how I try to live my own. Thank you.

  9. The video turned out just perfect, you got your message out and it was incredibly genuine. A lot of times pitches sound fake, rehearsed and well not genuine.

    Great tips on the insecurity, we forget that most of the time its just perceived and virtually all the people receiving the message (regardless of form) won’t notice anything wrong about it. I keep telling myself that regularly.

  10. Hi Courtney,

    I’ve been following you for over a year or so. I’m Spanish, so it’s kinda hard for me to express exactly what I want in English. I’m one of the gazillion out there that read blogs but don’t feel comfy commenting, but I think your post just needs one.
    I find you great in the video, just perfect!!! And by perfect I mean natural, you. We don’t want any robot in the video, not hesitating, not rethinking his/her words, nor a model. We want real people, not products, and you’ve proved to be authentic, which is kinda hard to find this days.
    The only thing I would change in the video is the part of your hair that is hiding your eye, but for the rest of it, it’s really great. You’re gonna give a magnificent webinar.

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