How to Make a Love List
While I typically like to stay firmly rooted in the present, I think there is something indulgent and exciting about taking a peek into a new year.
Instead of firm goal setting or setting resolutions, make a list of the things you’d love to do or start doing in 2012. A new year allows for a fresh start, clean slate or new approach. Actually, you can create those things for yourself anytime, but a new year is a special invitation to be bold, brave, and different.
Make a love list for 2012 including every possible thing you would like to consider in life, love, business and relationships. What would you really love to do in 2012? What would you like to see? Who will you be and who will you be with in 2012?
Before you start your list, eliminate the roadblocks and dream killers. This is not a list for accountability. You won’t be crossing things off or crying over your undone tasks at the end of the year. Instead, use your list to fuel your creative pursuits and to encourage routine breaking behavior. Let your love list remind you what is most important in your life.
I know your brain and heart are starting to sync up and thing about possibility, opportunity and all that lies ahead. Don’t stifle that by closing your email or jumping to the next thing. Instead, write your love list right now.
How you start is up to you but here are a few ideas.
- Curl up with a pencil and paper in your favorite place to be. Daydream in silence and write everything that comes to mind. Don’t edit or filter, just write. Star or highlight the 3 things you want to start first.
- Turn on your favorite music, gather colored pencils and paper and doodle away as you make your love list. Each item can be in a different color or you can add color all around the page.
- If you think better through images, search for images that inspire each item on your love list and make a collage.
- Close down everything on your computer except for workflowy or ommwriter and create your list. Print it or save it.
The next step should be the same regardless of the process. Frame your list or place it somewhere you can see everyday. Don’t let these brilliant, lovely ideas get buried in the stress of debt, or hidden by a long work day. Keep them alive by digging into them every day, even if it’s just 5 minutes. You might bring your entire list to life in 2012, or maybe just 1 item. Even better, a new idea might come from the combination of several love list items.
My 2012 Love List
- Yoga every week
- Learn Spanish
- Read 2 books a month or more (you can follow my progress)
- Travel to Italy
- Ski faster (just a little bit faster)
- Plant one flower a month (Thanks Alyson)
- Learn more about street yoga
- Give away more
- Buy only used/local/essential things
- Intentionally feed someone
- Take a last minute family road trip
- Make new friends
- Be even more with even less
- Write a book
- Do meaningful work
Your list can grow or shrink as the year goes on. Don’t hold yourself to exactly how you felt and just what you thought the day you wrote your list. Things change, you change, your list will change and your life will change. That’s beautiful, and so are you.
Happy new year my beautiful friends.
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great idea. would love to make love list.
Hakim, I hope you do!
Good idea
I’ve actually been setting up a budget for 2012 so I can afford my dreams: go back to school, finish my apartment (only two rooms left!) & then I have lots and lots of trips (8, actually) abroad planned for 2014 to plan for. My love list is simple though: spend as much time as I can with my family. Start trying to learn Hebrew. Give $100 to a charity (set up to give $100 in January to NILMDTS in memory of my angel). Thanks for the inspiration!
Nin, It sounds like you are building a lovely life with your love list.
Nice list. There are several things on it that I have on mine; for the past 10 years or so and still not executed.
Bill, Maybe it’s time to dump some of them? Is it time that gets in the way or motivation? I know learning Spanish has been on my list for quite sometime, but this year, I am determined to incorporate a habit of learning a little bit every day. Other things I’ve had on love lists have dropped off though because they stopped being important.
Yes, thank you! I’ve been reading “annual review” posts, as I’m sure you have as well, but I’m having a difficult time wrapping my head around “what were your biggest disappointments” and “what would you have done differently.” I don’t really agree with the premise that I a) have disappointments or b) should have done anything differently. These sound suspiciously like judgements and regrets, which I really don’t believe in. So, thank you! I can totally get behind a love list for 2012. Happy 2012, Courtney!
Hi Zoe,
I haven’t read any annual review posts this year strangely enough. 2011 was such an amazing year and I don’t think there is much to break down or reassess. 2012 may be different, but I think I am intuitively moving in the right direction.
Happy 2012 to you too!
Thanks for the ommwriter mention. I just downloaded it and it’s beautiful!
This is such a wonderful idea which I’m implementing today. I’ve been such a linear, goal-focused person most of my life. I’ve made a focused effort to change over the past year and I’m a much happier person as a result. I laughed at myself as I read your list. My old way of thinking popped up saying things like, “These things aren’t specific enough. There’s no goal date.” And that’s exactly the point which is one of the reasons I love the idea. It’s all about a way of being, not a list of things to do.
Many of us get caught up in all the things we “should” do over the coming year that we forget to focus on what makes our heart sing. I recently wrote about doing something we love first thing each day (instead of something we should do that we may procrastinate on) so that the happiness of taking that action spreads throughout our day. By learning to live each day and each moment in the present, I’m realizing that life is a series of moments to be experienced. By striving for future things (goals) and getting upset about not reaching them, we never notice the beauty of the present moment and we live our lives in a state of yearning and despair. Why not live each day in the pursuit of happiness? Don’t put off the fun and joyous things for later. Do them first. They usually don’t take much time. Because today may be your last.
Hi Paige, Like you, I’ve gone from linear and measurable goals to things that are more dynamic and intuitive. I’m so much happier like this!
I want to make a love list! You are so inspirational Courtney! I especially love the idea of intentionally feeding someone:) There are tons of people hurting all around us. What a brilliant year 2012 will be for you! Thank you for sharing!
Andrea, I hope you will share your list! I am sure it will be inspiring to others.
Love this!!! I have a , The LIst, that I make every year and it’s more of a 42 things to do before I am 43 list adding every year. But I like the longevity of this one that makes it more meaningful and long term!!! Thanks for this!
I love list…. this one is very inspiring!
I love your ideas, Courtney! can’t wait to get home after work and sit in my fav chair and start writing away my Love List!
Happy New Year to you and yours! Hope your love list comes through!!!
PAULA
Thank you for this idea!!
The whole new years resolution feels overwhelming for me but your approach is gentle and encouraging. Now I can’t wait to write up my love list!
Much love,
Tali
yeah, I’ve been thinking of creating a list for 2012 as well. Thanks for the reminder! I think it is important to write down your goals and desires and refer back to it often. Helps to stay on track and keep you motivated.
Courtney… this is beautiful!
Though I give myself major liberties to not follow them… I’m kinda into goals, schedules and plans, but this love list sounds so much more freeing. Thanks for it!
Excellent list. I never heard of ‘street yoga’. I learn something new every day.
Love this. Thank you so much! I found the link through a friend on twitter, so glad she re-tweeted! I’ve already written my Love List now, and I’m super excited about it! Great concept!
Love the love list. Such a great way to frame it -wants instead of shoulds! My love
List for 2012 is move everyday,weekly dates with my husband and weekly adventures with my daughter.
I also like to pick a word to live into and for this next year I’m picking “thrive”
Hi dear Courtney Carver
This is an awesome post, While reading your post, my heart started beating on a new rhythm I am really inspired. You are doing great work,
Love, peace and Sunshine
Great idea. I can help you with your Spanish homework. It’s my native language and I am a writer and a proofreader in Mexico.
So many times we tend to put a road block up before we even start. Make a love list and forget about the obstacles is such a great way to get that thought out of the picture.
I’ve been listening to people, even myself about the “can not because”….. I even did it with my own husband this morning. He’s going kayaking this morning without me and with a friend that has little ocean experience. My husband has one arm. I got afraid for him.
Really? He’s summitted Mt. Everest with one arm! Where are my limiting views coming from?
Mahalo Courtney for the love list idea… I’m off to create it now.
Just when I was working on my 2012 goals, I found your article…What great timing, and am now writing ideas with a new energy. Thanks
Courtney, I’m in love with your blog!
I love this perspective of thinking of goals in a positive light, something you look forward to. I typically think that I have to wait to do the things I love, but why am I waiting!
My new year begins with small goals that I value, but not sure I’m in love with them. I think I will have to mix them up a bit. Grab my journal…
P.S. I thought of you today, after I gave a homeless man the rest of my parking money. It was the first time, I didn’t flinch, I didn’t think twice, I gladly gave what I had with me. Not stingy, not guilty, just gave. Not for me, but for him.
Marci, You made my day. xoxo
Courtney, I love this approach! I used it for my resolutions this year and came up with about 19 things. Instead of making resolutions for things that I feel like I “should” be doing, I’m making reminders and commitments to myself to finally do those things I’ve been wanting to do. Awesome. I also left a comment on a friends blog linking back to this article. Thank you so much!
Finally had a chance to read this post today. LOVE it! I am sooo ready to make a list like this, it sounds happy and hopeful. Thanks for the inspiration!