One may be the loneliest number, but it also the easiest number to manage.
Stuff: We keep duplicates of our stuff because…
- One might break and I will have a back up.
- What if someone comes over and needs one too?
- If one is good, two or three is great.
- If we only have one, are we good enough?
- More than one will make us extra productive.
- It was a deal to buy more than one.
- If I use one up, then I won’t have to buy another one.
Last time I checked, for those of us privileged enough to clear the clutter, there is no shortage of stuff out there. If something breaks, or runs out, you can replace it. If you only have one, you might take better care of it, use less of it, or put it where you can find it every time.
Like you, I have more than one of most things too. When I challenged that one is enough, you responded more than 100 comments. Clearly you care about living with less. Did you try to live with just one? Will you try?
As part of a family of three, I understand having several plates, glasses, forks, knives, and towels, but why do I need two sets of measuring cups, two rolling pins, or two of the same DVD. I am sure that last issue was because someone gave me a gift, a duplicate, and instead of donating it right away, I held onto it. Huh? Was I ever going to watch the same movie at the same time? I’ve never made two recipes at the exact same time, demanding an extra set of measuring cups. Have you?
Do you have family dishes plus dishes for entertaining? Place mats that you only use for company? Why isn’t one set good enough? What about your glassware? Why does each beverage require a specially shaped glass?
Obligations: we overload our schedules because…
- We don’t want to be seen as lazy.
- We don’t know what to do with free time.
- There’s no time to address the fact that we are overworked and overwhelmed.
- A jam packed calendar means we are important.
- We don’t want to say no.
- Being too busy is better than disappointing someone.
Every day that we have too much too do, we are performing sub par and missing out on so much. Running from errand to errand, and place to place leaves us to tired to enjoy what really matters.
One is Powerful
When you decide to do one thing at a time, that one thing gets 100% of your focus, energy and attention. If you are used to jumping from task to task, you may not know your full potential for accomplishing great things.
Try One
To get a feel of what “just one” is like, live for a week with…
- Just one book by your bed
- Just one water glass for the whole day
- Just one website open at a time
- Just one conversation at a time
If you see big results from one little change, maybe you can apply the power of one to your drawers, cabinets and calendars. Could you live comfortably with even less? If you let go of the fear that you won’t have enough, could you live comfortably with just one?
Oh, I opened this at just the right time…I hope. I am currently pining over a set of Corelle dishware. Now, I have a perfectly good set of everyday dishware, plus assorted items of “good” china. (I’ve even sold one set of good china and another big set of everyday dishes.) But I love the look and feel of dishes — different colors and shapes for different moods. On the other hand, I also like opening my uncluttered cabinets and seeing only things I use and love. I’m trying to convince myself that I have to get rid of an equal or greater number of items BEFORE I buy anything else….but it is hard!
Holly, I feel your pain. I have collected different glasses and dishes over the years and really appreciate the beauty. Now though, I can still appreciate it without putting it in my kitchen. Instead of pining for stuff, I crave space. (but can still appreciate a beautiful Villeroy and Boch coffee cup)
I read in a column about people having too much stuff, so they invited friends with less, young adults getting their own place, etc. to pick out their unwanted things (like kitchen items not needed)they may need. Also, I have donated to group homes sets of dishes, kitchen gadgets, platters, coffee mugs, flatware, etc. as most was inherited. Certain items were sold to antique dealers. The kitchen is the worst room for clutter for most of us. Linen closets another. Too many towels, blankets, etc. not being used or old stuff kept after buying new. Gifts for newly weds: instead of buying gifts, if you have crystal, unused gifts, let them pick out what they want and tell them it’s your gift to them. I have even recycled gifts unopened to others. Most of the stuff is never used over time anyway.
I also have several sets of dishes, dessert plates, too many drink mugs, sets of matching bowls, and serving bowls. Some I gave to friends, but still can’t decide what to get rid of as I still have too much and we don’t entertain. Older items can be sold at antique shops as they buy stuff thats older even if pieces are missing as customers may want to get extra pieces to match a set they have, like china pieces. Kitchens are the hardest to declutter.
I’m going to be thinking about this a lot today and see where I can put this into practice! I’m often guilty of reading more than one book at a time and it’s so distracting! I don’t fully enjoy what I’m reading because I’m wondering when I’ll get to the other one.
Jill, I am so guilty of reading several books at a time. Just last week, I boxed up most of my books except for a few that are unread, but only one gets a place by my bed!
I used to have boxes and boxes of old bar decorations from my grandfathers old bar. All of the items had so many memories for me I didn’t want to part with them, but I had no bar and no place to display all of them. When I downsized my home I had no choice but to give away most of the items. I kept one. It now has a place in my living room and I see it every day. That ONE item has brought me more joy that boxes full of items I could never see.
Jason that is a perfect example of how to honor our family. Instead of thinking about a box of sentimental items, you can appreciate just one.
Hey Courtney. This is a great challenge. I’m guilty of having WAY too many Websites open at a time. In fact, right now I have two different windows with about 12 active tabs each. So I could definitely close some out.
And I have an extra set of measuring cups too. Even after I cleaned out my cupboard recently. I’m going to donate one set, because you’re right, I’ll never use it!
My extra measuring cups and spoons are going too! I also have way too many coffee mugs and rarely have people over for coffee. When I do, I don’t invite 8 at a time!
I have two sets of measuring cups on purpose. One set is american sizes (240ml per cup) and one set is australian (250ml per cup) so it’s needed in case I follow an american recipe. I still have to go through my glassware after your post the other day. We don’t drink. My dad drinks wine at Christmastime and that one glass is the only wineglass that is used. I really should donate all the other 12 glasses (I have several from different sets) and keep one for him or make him drink from a tumbler! I’d have a whole shelf. That’s space that can be kept free for the eye to rest on. 🙂
I try to use the same water glass all day. Even if I put something else in it, I will rinse and reuse.
Um, one website at a time open? That sounds great but not sure how that will work for me. Personally, my windows open are like my to-do list. But maybe I should rethink that.
I love this one “A jam packed calendar means we are important.” Crazy mixed up world we live in!
Great post Courtney!
Bernice
WAHM Interview with Emily Vanek
Bernice, The water cup is a big one. I always wonder how we fill the top shelf of our dishwasher in a day or two with only three of us.
I have one favorite spoon, one water jar, one favorite coffee cup, favorite tea cup.. and I use only these items when I need those items in my world. Quite simple and I love it. 😉 We are loving deleting duplicates from our lives … like the pluthera of wine glasses.. when WOULD WE EVER have that many people in our house. Never that’s when. 😀
Love it Laura! Seems like you can really appreciate your favorite things when you have less of them.
I agree with Laura about the wine glasses! How about we limit our guests to ONE at a time? 🙂 Plus, when you distill this idea down to its essence you find that we only have ONE LIFE and we should take great care not to overload our time, efforts and thoughts with non-essentials.
Bingo!
My family and I are moving into an RV voluntarily and so have sold most of our stuff over the last couple weeks. Everyone is horrified to see how little we have left. But I keep trying to explain this – we don’t need more than one set of measuring cups, pans, dishes, etc. Getting rid of the bulk of our possessions was fairly easy when we decided we only needed one of everything.
Hi Courtney. Thanks for the link 🙂 Funny, I was just saying to my partner last night that we use WAY too many dishes in one day. How do 2 people dirty 6 glasses?? as pretty logical grownups, we see that it’s excessive and we fix it. now, my 4 and 5 yr olds…that’s another story. my next blog post is going to be about explaining living with less to pre-schoolers!
Hi Courtney! Thanks for all of your inspiring ideas! I am slowing thinning our stuff down as well. I love the idea that Jason had of saving ONE nice item in a collection to remind us of a loved one who’s gone on. Now if I can just get my husband to agree to get rid of his mom’s ceramic bird collection save one. haha As for the measuring cups for instance, sometimes I DO cook a couple or more things at once, to make extra meals to freeze, or for leftovers, or give away. I really dislike having to stop and wash a dry measuring cup that had shortening in it, to use it for flour. Slows down the flow 🙂 But we do use the one glass a day (or longer if we rinse well). Wonder if I could get my husband to sell his mom’s crystal that we NEVER use? hmmmmmmm
Use the Crystal!!! 😀
When my boyfriend and I moved in together last summer, we each brought a ton of glassware to the new place. We have very little kitchen storage (even by minimalist standards!), so I bought a hutch at Ikea to display everything because they were very nice (and to store all our dogs stuff in the bottom). Well, of course, I look at it often and contemplate which of my glasses I could get rid of. Do I really need 4 margarita glasses? I don’t know the last time I had one at home. The martini glasses are pretty, but 6? I did get rid of some wine glasses and kept my 4 nicest ones (because I do actually use those enough to warrant keeping them).
However, the boy’s side of the hutch needs some work. Unfortunately, most of his glasses came from his grandfather who passed away two summers ago. So, of course, it’s difficult to broach the subject of getting rid of them. Maybe if I scale back all of mine, he’ll follow! I also hope to set a good example by continuing to donate much of my mom’s stuff that I originally kept when she passed away three years ago. One or two trinkets are far more valuable than half a closet full of junk I never look at!
Joshua Millburn wrote a great post on getting rid of sentimental items on Tammy’s Rowdy Kittens blogs recently – http://rowdykittens.com/2011/03/sentimental-items/
I have recently begun trying this single tasking. One thing at a time. It seems much more efficient for me. The one browser open at a time would be a challenge though, maybe I should try it!
Adrienne, If I have more than one site open, I tend to browse or “check in”. With only one, I am focused and productive. Let me know if you notice a difference.
I usually have quite a few tabs open in one window, but when I want to focus on reading one article I’ll just switch to Full Screen mode so I can’t see the tabs, menus etc, just the text.
Great post Courtney! I found myself nodding and saying “yes!” —– until I got to the part about one book and one web site open at a time. BUSTED! I’m always reading at least 4-5 books at a time, and I always have 8-9 tabs open on my browser at any given time. Oops! Thanks for the reminders about how important and special one thing at a time can be.
If one reads each book of the several, with full attention then it’s like anything else-one is mindful and fully present. Nothing wrong with that. We may have moods-such as poetry at bedtime for example. Or fun fiction on the weekend. It’s not about rules but about being present and aware in each moment. That is what keeps anxiety and stress at bay. Namaste.
One book by the bed? Blasphemy! Seriously, though, you’re right on! I especially loved this line: “If you only have one, you might take better care of it, use less of it, or put it where you can find it every time.”
When my kids were babies we always had a million pacifiers, but could never find one. When we’d get down to just one pacifier, we always knew where it was!
Julie, That’s too funny, but makes total sense!
Oh My…did this one hit home or what? Now…dissect, if you will..the INSANITY of going into Gap (for instance) and finding the PERFECT charcoal grey l-sleeve T-shirt. Now, one oughta be enough, right? NO…Susan needs to purchase THREE identical size XS Gap l-sleeve grey T-shirts… In case of what? Two are destroyed in a house fire and I’ll be damned glad I am wearing the only survivor? I can repeat this story way more than I’d be comfortable doing….but suffice to say…duplicates of favorite Dansko boots, Merrell boots (still in original box).
I am definitely working my way towards my goal of less consumerism and less stuff….but I can certainly see areas where I question my motive behind these duplicate purchases and hope to stop myself before I come home with a “Baker’s Dozen” of ANYTHING EVER AGAIN!
Cheers to you!
Susan
Susan, I loved your comment and your profile pic is just lovely, you look like a happy lady! Heres to just one thing!
Thanks for the nice words, Stacey! Loved your post, too! Ah….the promise of LESS STUFF and FEWER COMMITMENTS in my life drives me to continue being an avid follower of this blog!
Been there, done that…at the Gap!
This post could not have come at a more perfect time for me. Last night I stayed up until 1am to write a new story for myself and my business because of this esact reason…I need to do just ONE thing and do it well. How many times have I tried to do everything all the time, at the expense of just doing one thing at a time, all the while, robbing myself of time to think and reflect. Yesterday, I went to do some writing at a local cafe. For the 1st time ever, I took just my ipad. Normally, I would take my laptop (in case ipad failed), notebok & pen and a folder full of ideas and notes. I end up overwhelmed and distracted. To take just ONE THING, was so refreshing and how light was my journey 🙂
In the busyness of running my organisation, your blog is 1 of 3 that is a MUST read for me. I want you to know that your writing makes a difference to my world, {especially this week, where I wrote about you twice http://sunnymummy.com.au/2011/03/a-new-path/ }. Keep up the great work Courtney, know you are making the world a better place! Sunny Mummy from Down Under 😉
Stacey, Thank you for the nice mentions. I am going to pop back over to your blog and take a closer look. I am really honored that my blog made the cut as a MUST read and so appreciate your support. Where are you in Australia? One of my very close friends is from Perth.
I do need more than one set of measuring cups sometimes bake up to three things at the same time and can be sweet or savoury or gluten free so I have three sets!! Some nights I can bake up to 15 cakes a night so I definately need more!!! other things I could really do with less though
Brie? 15 cakes a night? Please tell me this is a career. 😉
“The Power of One”- I remember that novel by Bryce Courtenay, it was a good read about the triumph of the human spirit and the difference that one can make against racism and injustice.
One is powerful. Lately I have been trying to mindfully work on one thing at a time. It’s hard, but the results are measurably better, so I am persisting with it.
It will be interesting to see what this new approach, after so many years of trying to balance multi tasking, will achieve in my life.
I am heading out to my storage shed and purging TWO down comforters and donating them tomorrow at the Goodwill. How many down comforters do two happily married people need? Am I saving the others in case we have company…(God, I hope NOT). Feeling motivated to see empty space and less stuff!
Susan, You go girl!
When I was baking, I did, in fact, use more than one set of measuring spoons and cups. Now, I cannot swallow – I have one teapot for my tube feeding and coffee/cocoa, one spoon I like and one cup I use. Others are still around but on the way out. I liked this post particularly.
This is such a brilliant post, and the sentiment rings so true! I used to have a stack of 12 books by my bed and I’d dip into them all from time to time, picking and choosing but never really READING anything. These days I confine it to one and find my concentration is much improved as a result. I also agree with your points re: schedules – we were only ever programmed to do one thing at a time (I think), and just because we CAN multi-task if we put our minds to it, that doesn’t necessarily mean that we SHOULD – it’s not wrong to take our time!
I couldn’t agree more! I also have 1 husband, 1 son, 1 blog, 1 set of white dishes (plus my mother’s china). Sometimes I’ll see a friend’s table set so beautifully with yet another set of dishes and I’ll momentarily consider doing the same; but it passes. I would rather spend the money on quality food to put on that 1 set of dishes. Love your blog Courtney.
Thanks Dana! I really appreciate your kind words.
I love the power of one. I’ve experienced the joy of having only one cup, one plate, one bowl to call my own. There are areas in my life that haven’t met the magic of one yet though. I still have three pairs of shoes. I could do two pairs, but one? One is scary!
Perhaps I’ll start smaller. I still load up on library books. Could I be like my honey and come out of the library with only one book instead of ten? Hmmm. A challenge. 🙂
Tanja, I love the comment on the library books. At any one time I have a good portion of the library on my bedside table. I even have 12 outstanding requests for more books! On my next visit, I’m only checking out one. Definitely a challenge for me.
Excellent post again, Courtney!
Years ago, I read in one of Elaine St. James’ “Simple” books (forgot which one) about having one knife, one fork, and one spoon per person. That always made sense to me – though we never practiced it. 🙁
Thanks for the reminder. You are ONE great blogger.
Thank You Gene.
To chime in on this comment – Elaine St. James (in the same book, I believe) talked about a friend who wanted to “remove the Baskin-Robbins from her life” (IOW, too many choices available). That story has resonated with me — as has this post.
I protest! I am still a minimalist, just a very well-prepared minimalist. I like multiples. I like them a lot.
But, I do stubbornly insist that I will not have multiples of anything we don’t actually use. Still, I have two sets of the same mixing bowls, all nested together (we DEFINITELY use them, even with my no-dirty dishes policy), two sets of measuring spoons and cups, two sets of silverware (we use these much less often, but it’s necessary for times when we’re entertaining–I refuse to buy/use plastic forks!), two sets of sheets for every bed, two sets of towels . . . I don’t even want to imagine my life without multiples.
Even with all those multiples and the many more that I didn’t list, we still don’t have clutter or unnecessary items going unused and we don’t have the added expense and waste of buying disposable supplies for our guests, either.
Things I do think I should try: one book on my bedside table (I only read one at a time, but I keep a healthy stack in their ‘order-to-be-read’) and one website open (I’m guilty of having six tabs open at this very moment). You’ve definitely given me something to contemplate.
This post is very timely for me. Later this year we’ll be doubling up on our number of children (and it’s too late to limit ourselves to just one as I’m already 13 weeks pregnant). 🙂 So we’re making room, which includes combining my husband’s office with my craft room. I’m sure between those two rooms we have an absurd amount of duplication and we don’t even realize it!
Here’s one more side benefit of cutting back to one: Sometimes I want a duplicate of something so I don’t have to fetch the other one from another part of the house. For example, I have pairs of scissors in at least three different places. If I limited it to just one, I would be forced to get a little more exercise walking up and down the stairs to fetch them. “Just one” could be my new fitness program!
Jessica, Congrats on the new baby on the way! I love your idea for more fitness.
I recently sold/donated a number of books and DVDs that my family and I no longer read or watch. I was amazed to find three duplicate books and a duplicate DVD while working on the project. I wasn’t even aware that we owned the duplicates. I guess the duplicates got in the house as gifts.
I splurged on a duplicate pair of scissors recently purely for convenience. One pair lives in the kitchen and the other lives in my desk drawer in another room.
Great post! Courtney, I enjoy your blog!
Thanks Karla!
Yikes! I have seven knitting projects going right now and six books I’m reading. I needed to read this post!
I keep a vintage Blue Willow coffee cup next to the kitchen sink for anyone who just wants a quick drink of water. As long as no one is sick, we all use this one cup and it gets washed every day or two. (We use recycled paper cups for someone who has a cold or the flu.) However, I have 3 glass serving bowls, 2 ceramic serving/mixing bowls, and a set of 3 stainless steel mixing bowls. I could really pare that group down! Thanks for the reminder that one is often enough (1 pair of sandals, 1 pair of loafers, 1 pair of tennies) — but I’m still going to keep a couple of pairs each of jeans and black trousers, and two towels and two washcloths for each person in the family. I think your point is that we should be mindful of what we own and do — not just accumulating more or doing more “because it’s there.”
You don’t mention, but I think it’s true, that this idea is perfect for those of us who struggle to maintain a healthy weight. Rather than making a lot of foods “taboo,” we might be happier and more successful if we just eat one — one small serving, one cookie, one yummy fattening hors d’oeuvres at a friend’s holiday party, one glass of wine.
I think this is brilliant. I have been feeling a major pull to simplify and I this inspires me on so many levels. I’m looking forward to subscribing to blog feed!
Just one book by my bed, always working on that, but never getting there. The more I blog, the more I want to read. One at a time, a task at a time, that’s doable, and so beneficial when I make it happen!
I found your site from Tess the Bold Life. I love what you are saying here!
I have tried hard the last few years to de-clutter and simplify. I started with my kitchen and I think that is a great place to start. But I also love your take on just “doing one thing at a time” and the awareness that can bring with making that simple change.
The only part for me that doesn’t apply is the one child. I have three, and one dog. The dog is more difficult than the three children. Oh well, can’t win them all!
Looking forward to reading more!
Jen
Courtney,
This is my first visit to your website, and I’m so ecstatic about finding you! Absolutely, absolutely! I’ve definitely been evolving to become a much more minimalistic individual, and team (my fiancee included), and it simply feels better, to remove the clutter and be proud of your possessions!
I used to think that getting the cheapest deal was the best, but I’m finding more and more that I crave value, and I’m willing to pay a little more for something that I will use, and holds great value to me.
I’m currently in the process of moving, and I always find it a great opportunity to re-evaluate what I have in my life, and cut the clutter even more!
I really look forward to following you, take care!
I see this same mentalitly in my Mothers motivation for having extras on hand always. I understand why she does this. She grew up extremely poor and its seems as if she almost panics at the thought of having to do without. I know this is who she is and I accept it because I love her so much. It just makes me sad for her at the same time. I wonder if because she and my Dad were able to provide such a good and fufilling childhood for me if thats why I dont have the same hangups. I love the idea of having what you need and use, caring for it, repsecting it and living your life. That is so much more meaningful than having a drawer completely dedicated to soft fuzzy socks. Its ok and I cant complain because at the same time my Mom respects my life choices, even if she occassionally has to send me extra socks. The only thing besides the obvious you meantioned that I cant really get by with just one would be cat boxes. LOL, yeah I know kind of silly but I have 3 cats and I really dont want to piss them off and have them feel the need to get even wiht me 😉
my way of “1” is “Be Here Now” one converation at a time, looking my daughter in the eyes when she talks to me. (closing the book, turning away from the computer screen, shutting off the t.v.) my relationships with real people are important. i am learning to treat them that way.
Thans Courtney!!!
This article came at the exact moment when I was about to start “my most focused project ever” which still contained two projects embedded in it – lol – what vicious pattern!
Thanks a lot.
I cut the additional project inside and now I just have one.
I feel super focused since the very moment I removed the other project from my planning.
God bless you.
A year ago, my husband and I moved from a very large house to a small house (1100 sq ft). When it came time to get cable set up, he wanted two receivers installed – in case we both wanted to watch something at the same time. There is nothing so important to require a second tv, so the second receiver sits in another room unused.
I grew up with only one tv in the house, my husband grew up with more. And when it came time for him to be head of household, he did what was modeled for him. I see our media consumption, whether it be via the internet, network television, or video games as a detrimental thing for families because it is used to separate and divide rather than unite. So what if there is just one tv, with one video game console attached to it, and one computer in the home where a family has to cooperate, negotiate, and come together to be entertained together?
I remember watching some important and thought provoking mini-series on tv as a child with my family. Things like Roots, The Winds of War, The Blue and the Gray, and documentaries about Auschwitz. They prompted questions for me that I was able to ask my parents and I see that as being formative to the person I am today. How different could things be for me today, if I’d had the option as a kid to go off in my room and watch something else on tv by myself?
Interesting and motivational post! I don;t know you if you read my comment on another post-
I had 42 places to sit at my home ( I live alone).
I am always amazed at the people I run into that are Hurricane Katrina survivors- all with stories about packing clothes for three days only to find their homes and everything in them were destroyed.
Two weeks ago I gave my leather couch to one such family and today I was invited to their home for Labor Day. As the husband pulled a home made enormous pizza from the oven, he commented how he wished he had an extra large pizza pan, ( I have three). Guess what I am purging from the depths of my cabinet tomorrow.
Oh and last week I cleaned out the pantry and tossed 2 large trash bags of expired food
I only own one dry measurement thingy, whats the problem with that? I never bake hehe,
now the rest of my house, that is another story. but I am new to decluttering and I will get there. great blog,