Courtney Carver

Weekend Favorites: good sleep, good habits and joyfear

by Courtney Carver

Weekend Wisdom: Feeling guilty for taking care of yourself is not taking care of yourself.

With my new book coming out in a few short weeks, I’m starting to feel all the feelings. I’m happy and excited and also nervous and anxious (all at once). My friend Leo calls this jumbled up group of feelings … JOYFEAR.

Leo says, “Having only joy is great. Having only fear sucks. But having both … that’s life-defining.” You can read more about it here. When my joyfear is leaning more towards fear and less towards joy, I simply take a big deep breath in through my nose and let it out with a big sigh through my mouth and let it pass through me, and out of me. It doesn’t always work the first time, but eventually I come back to calm.

Ok … onto the favorites.

Try the Anti-Procrastination Decluttering Challenge (You’ll clear ten spaces in ten minutes and 100 items).

My friend Tammy says this 15 minute practice can help you sleep better.

I loved this article about dropping the right kind of weight in 2020.

MindBodyGreen asked me to write about making wardrobe edits. I said yes.

If you are interested in creating good habits (or breaking bad ones), this Hidden Brain podcast episode will help.

I’ve got these three songs on repeat right now.

And my Instagram fav of the week goes to @abundantlifewithless.

I hope you enjoy this edition of Weekend Favorites and have a beautiful weekend.

xo,

Courtney

P.S. A quick note about the new Project 333 video course … I’m filming the new Project 333 Capsule Wardrobe Course early next month and if you pre-order (before March 3rd) Project 333, The Minimalist Fashion Challenge that Proves Less Really is So Much More, you can join the course for free. You are welcome to order any version of the book from your favorite bookseller, from anywhere in the world and submit your receipt information through the redemption form on this page.

The One Thing I Did That Simplified My Life The Most

by Courtney Carver

I’ve made a bunch of changes over the years in an attempt to live a happier, healthier, more present life and they’ve all simplified my life.

Changes including …

Decluttering and choosing to live with less stuff.
Paying off tens of thousands of dollars in debt and becoming debt free.
Giving away most of my clothes.
Downsizing to an apartment less than half the size of my house.

These were big changes that made a big difference in my life and some of these changes happened years ago. But the thing I did that simplified my life the most only happened a year ago.

I stopped drinking alcohol.

On being sober

I had my last glass of wine on January 19, 2019 and my last hangover on January 20, 2019.

I’ve been sober for a year. I haven’t had a drink in 365 days. Until now, the longest I’ve gone without alcohol was when I was pregnant with my daughter … more than 24 years ago.

I usually didn’t think alcohol was a problem for me. I didn’t think I was an alcoholic. I didn’t think I needed to quit drinking, but eventually I wanted to. Simplifying my life has encouraged me to remove the things that remove me from my life and alcohol did that.

For the longest time, I thought drinking was fun and relaxing but now that it’s been out of my life for a year, it’s clear that it was those things for a moment but then it often turned into not feeling well physically and mentally (the opposite of fun and relaxing).

It doesn’t matter how much you drink

I used to read about people struggling to quit drinking and their stories made me feel better about my own relationship with alcohol. I didn’t drink every day. I didn’t drive drunk and crash my car. I lived a healthy life. I took care of my family and loved my work. My comparison blurred the lines on wondering if my life might be better without alcohol.

I recently read a brilliant new book, We Are the Luckiest: The Surprising Magic of a Sober Life by Laura McKowen that gave me some clarity.

Laura says, “It doesn’t matter if you haven’t edged as close to disaster as I did. It doesn’t matter if no one believes you when you say you have a problem. As they say, it doesn’t matter how much you drink, or how often, but what happens to you when you do. If something is keeping you from being fully present and showing up in your life the way you want, then deciding to change that thing is an actual matter of life and death, you know? It’s the difference between existing and actually living.”

I choose actually living. Fully living. My life is better without alcohol. Less is usually the answer for me but when it comes to alcohol, the magic number is none.

Have all my problems been solved? Nope.

Is my life simpler? YES!

How being sober has simplified my life

For 365 days (perhaps longer by the time you read this), I haven’t had a hangover, I haven’t spent money on alcohol, I haven’t picked a restaurant based on their wine list. I haven’t had to decide on “one more glass.” I haven’t said or done anything I regret or don’t remember.

You might be wondering if I think being sober would simplify your life. I have no idea. It depends on how alcohol affects your life now. I could say the same thing about clutter, debt, shopping or the size of your home. Maybe it works well for you and maybe it doesn’t.

I often wonder why I thought (and believed the thought) that I had to hit some kind of rock bottom or be on the edge of disaster to quit drinking.

If you are questioning what removes you from your life and prevents you from showing up and enjoying your life, the only way to know for sure is to live without it and see how you feel. Then you’ll have more information and can make decisions based on what you experience instead of believing everything you think.

Taking breaks from things like alcohol, coffee, sugar, shopping, social media and other things I wasn’t sure about gave me information I needed on how to proceed based on how I feel instead of what I think I will feel.

If you’d like to read more about why I quit drinking and the resources that helped, read Why I Stopped Drinking Alcohol and How I Did It.

Weekend Favorites: procrastination, hurry slowly and closet chaos

by Courtney Carver

Weekend Wisdom: Think about the most stressful area of your life. If you could simplify that one thing, it would likely simplify everything else.

January is in full swing and my resolutions are going strong. I have two resolutions this year. The first is my resolution from last year which was to show up ten minutes early for every appointment and read a book (instead of scroll through Instagram) if I have to wait. I think I made it to April before I started showing up just in time, leaving me more pressed and stressed than I needed to be.

My second 2020 resolution is to send a thank you note every week. This might include mailing a card or leaving a note behind for someone who made me smile during my day. This resolution is inspired by Gina from Thank You Year.

If one of your resolutions is to stop procrastinating (or to figure out why you or people you love procrastinate), you’ll love this conversation with Procrastination Coach, Dr. Christine Li.

Ok … onto the favorites.

A relationship ritual that will make you a happier couple. I think you could apply this to other types of relationships too (family, roommate …).

Earlier this week I shared exactly what’s in my closet.

Yum.

I love the Hurry Slowly Podcast. Listen to this short episode on how to hold space for yourself. I’m taking notes!

When I’m in writing mode (as I am right now), I make a new playlist for first drafts. I edit in silence but listen to music while creating.

20 unconventional books for those who are grieving.

Closet Detox: 10 steps to end closet chaos and what you must give up to be free.

The Project 333 Book Tour is kicking off on 3-3 in NYC! If you live nearby, join me at Barnes & Noble, Tribeca. Learn more here.

And my Instagram fav of the week goes to @createcultivate for this reminder that we can start whatever we want, whenever we want.

I hope you enjoy this edition of Weekend Favorites and have a beautiful weekend.

xo,

Courtney

P.S. Some of you have been asking how I take care of myself when I’m traveling. With a multi-city book tour coming up, I’m revisiting the recommendations for healthy travel that I wrote two years ago.

Capsule Wardrobe List: What I’m Wearing (and why it’s important)

by Courtney Carver

Before I share my capsule wardrobe list, I want to tell you why it’s important. It’s not about the perfect pair of jeans or little black dress or how I accessorize. In fact, I’m the last person you should ask for fashion advice. I’m much more interested in how we are living our lives and taking care of ourselves than what we are wearing.

Deciding what to wear might not change your life, but deciding how to decide what to wear … that’s life changing.

At first, one of the places I resisted simplifying was my closet and today one of the simplest places in my life is my closet. Interestingly, my chaotic, clutter-filled closet added stress to the rest of my life and my simple, calm, decision-free closet has removed stress from my life.

2020 is the 10th anniversary of Project 333 so this clearly not a passing fad. Because this challenge is changing closets AND lives, it’s not going anywhere (except into more closets … maybe yours).

I hear from people on a daily basis about their Project 333 experiences.

Here’s a few of them …

I have a new sense of freedom from my past. Certain clothes reminded me of jobs and seasons of my life 15+ years ago. Now I have an incredible sense of presence coupled with an excitement for the future!
By decluttering my wardrobe I learned slowly, that I don’t need stuff in order to feel good about myself.
I finally started realizing what I like and that clothes do not change who I am. I still like to look nice and put together, but I do not let clothes determine who I am.
I love my simple but beyond enough wardrobe, taking better care of what I have and all the free time, peace and ease that fewer choices bring.

My Project 333 Capsule Wardrobe List

It’s been awhile since I’ve shared a seasonal capsule wardrobe list but with growing excitement about minimalist fashion challenge Project 333 and the new book coming out, I thought it might be a good time.

This is not a list of items I think you should own, or a special formula. It’s simply the wardrobe that works best for my body and my lifestyle. If you are joining me on the Project 333 Book Tour, I’ll likely be wearing some of these items.

If I don’t mention a color on clothing items, you can assume it’s black.

Accessories: (8)

1. Sunglasses (brown)

2. Purse

3. Tote

4. Travel bag

5. Hat (white/gray)

6. Gloves

7. Scarf

8. Scarf (mauve)

Jewelry: (3)

9. Crystal Bracelet Stack

10. Necklace

11. Earrings

Shoes: (4)

12. Winter Boots

13. Sneakers

14. Booties

15. Heels

Clothing: (18)

16. Winter Coat

17. Trench Coat (cream)

18. Puffy Vest (ice blue)

19. Leggings

20. Skinny Jeans

21. Black Pants

22. Dress (olive)

23. Skirt

24. Sweater (tan)

25. Wrap Sweater (gray)

26. Zip-up Sweatshirt

27. Sweater with collar (navy)

28. Long Sweater (gray)

29. Button Down Long Sleeve Shirt

30. Short Sleeve Crew Neck

31. V-Neck Sleeveless

32. Chambray Long Sleeve Button Down

33. Blazer

What’s on your capsule wardrobe list?

As I mentioned, this is my list. When you create your list, consider items that best fit your body and lifestyle. I chose items that would work from January through March (winter into early spring weather). Try Project 333 and you’ll be amazed at the stress you remove from your closet and your life.

I’ll be sharing pictures of my capsule wardrobe and other people doing Project 333 on the new Project 333 Instagram Account. If you are sharing your before and after pics or daily outfits, please use hashtag #project333 so I can cheer you on!

The new Project 333 Video Course will be available in March and the book will be available on March 3, 2020. When you pre-order Project 333, The Minimalist Fashion Challenge that Proves Less Really is So Much More, you’ll get free access to the course and a digital mini minimalist fashion guide to help you get started with creating your own capsule wardrobe.

Weekend Favorites: rise up, love your job & cancel plans

by Courtney Carver

Weekend Wisdom: You are allowed to protect your time and energy.

Sending you love this weekend from Amsterdam. My sister and I are exploring the city, drinking tea, doing yoga, eating poffertjes and simply enjoying each other’s company. We have no agenda or big plans which suits us just fine.

I hope you have some time to do nothing this weekend too. If not, look ahead to next weekend. Is there anything you can cancel today so you relax a little more? Getting things accomplished feels good but don’t underestimate the power of doing less. Create some time to spend your life the way you want to spend your life.

Ok … onto the favorites.

Do you track your habits? This article will show you how.

I was honored to celebrate The Minimalist Mom’s 100th podcast episode with this interview.

The Everygirl’s list of best books from 2019.

If decluttering feels impossible, this will help.

The simplest rules of simplicity.

I’m creating a new video course for minimalist fashion challenge Project 333. If you pre-order the new Project 333 book, you’ll get the course for free.

My very first Yoga teacher wrote this book.

Your ultimate guide to getting things done in a way that best serves your health and your heart

How to turn the job you have into the one you love.

When I’m down, this song helps me rise up.

And my Instagram fav of the week goes to @glennondoyle. You really don’t have to explain yourself.

I hope you enjoy this edition of Weekend Favorites and have a beautiful weekend.

xo,

Courtney

10 Little Things to Remember if You Struggle to Declutter

by Courtney Carver

There is a lot of hype around decluttering this time of year, but that doesn’t mean that it’s easy, fun or something you are excited about. If you struggle to declutter, these 10 little notes and quotes will help.

I recommend picking a couple that you like and jotting them down somewhere so when you are experiencing the declutter struggle, you can use the words for some motivation or as a reminder for why you are doing this.

10 Little Things to Remember if You Struggle to Declutter

1.

Half the battle is getting clutter out of your house, but the other half is getting it completely out of your life. If you tend to leave bags and boxes of items to donate in closets, trunks and other places, make it a point to let it all the way go.

2.

Don’t save the good stuff for a special occasion. Life is a special occasion. Use the good dishes. Wear and enjoy your favorite things. Let go of the rest.

3.

I am the queen of excuses before decluttering. “Someone gave that to me.” “That has sentimental value.” “I might need that someday.” I’m the one with the tight grip. The solution? Letting go, over and over again.

4.

If you feel anxious or frazzled, have trouble making decisions or don’t trust yourself, look around. Your outsides can affect your insides.

5.

Maybe decluttering isn’t so bad after all.

6.

When you struggle to declutter ask yourself, “what do I really want for my heart, for my family, for my life?”

7.

Simplicity = clarity. It’s the only math I really understand.

8.

For a really long time I thought I needed more stuff to be happy or successful. I need less than I think to be happy. Way, way less. Happiness isn’t waiting for us, it’s within us.

9.

If it costs you your peace, it’s too expensive.

10.

When people remember me, I don’t want them to remember my shoes, my furniture or decades of things I stored in containers. When people I love grieve me, I don’t want them to have to make decisions about things I never really cared about. I don’t want my legacy to be containers full of stuff, but rather how I loved while I was here.

I hope these reminders help you when you struggle to declutter and let go.

P.S. If you want to spend time with me in 2020 …

Join me on the Project 333 Book Tour (in your city or virtually).

Weekend Favorites: boundaries, walls of love and ginger shots

by Courtney Carver

Weekend Wisdom: Maybe for this new year, instead of becoming a new you just get closer to being the real you.

I thought I might be getting sick over the holidays so in addition to celery juice, I added a shot of apple, lemon, ginger juice to my morning routine. I’ll never know for sure, but I’m going to give my little ginger shots credit for helping me stay healthy. What’s keeping you healthy this time of year?

Fresh flowers might not ward off a cold or the flu but they definitely contribute to my mental health this time of year.

Ok … onto the favorites.

Bailey and I recorded a podcast about boundaries. We even talk about the boundaries that improve our relationship.

Speaking of boundaries, I didn’t know what they were in my twenties but I’m glad my daughter does.

If you are new to juicing, here’s a green juice recipe and some juicing tips to help you get started.

Here are ten songs I’ll be including in my Q-1 playlist (I make a new playlist every quarter).

I chose one little word to guide me through 2020. This is it.

A minimalist family house tour.

May we all build Walls of Love this year.

Minimalist Fashion Challenge Project 333 and The Minimalism Game started on January 1. If you’re interested in a simplicity challenge but haven’t gotten started, use the weekend to get started. So what if you are a few days late?!

I shared the 10 best simplicity posts from 2019 here.

And my Instagram fav of the week goes to @marcandangel. These year-end notes to self can be applied all year long.

I hope you enjoy this edition of Weekend Favorites and have a beautiful weekend.

xo,

Courtney

P.S. Registration for the Soulful Simplicity course closes on January 9th and the six-week course begins on January 13th. Click here to learn more.

10 Best Simplicity Articles from 2019

by Courtney Carver

Before saying goodbye to 2019, I want to celebrate the best parts including the 10 best simplicity articles from Be More with Less.

In 2020, we’ll be celebrating …

ten years of this amazing community
the new book, Project 333, The Minimalist Fashion Challenge that Proves Less Really is So Much More
much more less

And today, I celebrate how far we’ve come in the last ten years, and how special the last year has been. Instead of looking forward, starting over and getting lost in the new year, today, I’ll stay here. I’ll stay here and reflect on the last decade, the last year and appreciate the beauty and stillness of today.

The 10 Best Simplicity Articles from Be More with Less

1. 7 Tiny Steps for the Beginner Minimalist

2. How to Build a Capsule Wardrobe

3. Please Stop Wearing These 3 Things

4. 7 Perks of a Minimalist Wardrobe

5. The Story of the Mexican Fisherman

6. Decluttering 101: 10 Rules to Help You Live with Less Stuff

7. Decluttering Burst: How to Let Go of 100 Things in Less than an Hour

8. Why I Don’t Save Journals or Other Sentimental Items

9. Becoming Debt-Free: 21-Day Guide to Help You Get Started

10. How to Become a Minimalist (or just simplify your life a little)

The Real Big Things of 2019

In both my business and personal life, 2019 was full of small, ordinary moments and I treasure them. There were some big things too, things that have changed my life and/or business in some way.

Started the Soul & Wit Podcast with my daughter Bailey. We’ve released 9 episodes and are having a blast.
Created the Soulful Simplicity 6-Week Video Course. Our next session begins January 13th.
I quit drinking Alcohol. This has probably been the most significant change. I had my last drink on January 19th, and my last hangover on January 20th.
Began practicing Transcendental Meditation.
Finished writing and editing my new book, Project 333 and planned a multi-city tour to celebrate.
I relaxed … a lot.

Thank you for being a part of my decade, a part of my year and a part of my day … and thank you for letting me be a part of yours.

I love us.

xo,

Courtney

If Your Star is Crooked and You Burnt the Cookies

by Courtney Carver

Last year, just before Christmas, I wrote about the crooked star on our tree. I heard from so many of you excited to let go of the idea that everything has to be perfect over the holidays (or anytime) that I want to share the story again.

One of the first things you might notice about our Christmas tree is the crooked star. I love our little star, but it will not stay straight on a tree. Years ago, I used to try to straighten it, but after a few days of the dog barreling into the tree or the cats using the tree as their own personal playground, the star would be crooked again.

Now I embrace our crooked star. I don’t try to fix it or make it look like all the other stars and I don’t apologize for it when people mention it’s a little off-center. I’m ok with it. It’s like me, like all of us … imperfect, unique, messy and perhaps a little off-center. It reminds me to let go and let things be what they will be, and let people be who they are.

Don’t apologize for crooked stars, messy wrapping, burnt cookies, or a home that looks lived in instead of picture perfect. We are in all of those things. Our imperfections make us perfect for each other.

When we are willing to share ourselves as we are instead of who we think people expect us to be, and before we’ve got everything straightened out, cleaned up or figured out, we give others a chance to see us for who we really are, to know our hearts, to fall in love with us, and perhaps we inspire others to share their crooked stars too.

xo,

Courtney

Weekend Favorites: special library, unexpected rules and a gift for you

by Courtney Carver

Weekend Wisdom: Our homes are not containers for stuff but rather a place for love and connection. Let’s make room for more of that.

With the holidays upon us, it’s time to prioritize giving … to ourselves. I know, I know, most of us are used to giving to everyone around us and ignoring what’s best for us this time of year so this might feel weird. It’s not too late though. This is the most meaningful gift you can give yourself right now. And bonus: it’s a gift that will keep on giving to you and everyone around you.

Emma Block illustrated my new book, Project 333 and she created the image above. I thought it was too sweet not to share with you.

Ok … onto the favorites.

A big-hearted human created a stick library for dogs. I’ll say it again … a stick library for dogs.

Staying on the theme of all things sweet and lovely, a five-year old paid off the lunch debt of 123 students with a hot cocoa stand.

These are my favorite winter songs.

If you’d like to spend more time with me next year, work with me in January or join me on tour in March or April.

This 16 minute yoga practice will help you slow down.

I’m happy to report that talking to yourself is a secret superpower. In case (like me), you talk to yourself ALL THE TIME.

These ten decluttering rules aren’t what you think.

If you are new to Weekend Favorites, check out this one and this one.

And my Instagram fav of the week goes to @herincrediblemindset. This sounds like a lot to let go of in a very short time, but even if you just release one of these things, you’ll make more space for what you want next year.

I hope you enjoy this edition of Weekend Favorites and have a beautiful weekend.

xo,

Courtney

P.S. In the latest episode of the Soul & Wit podcast, Bailey and I talk about why we don’t believe in a “New Year, New You” attitude, how to make the most of the start of the new year, goal setting (or not setting) and of course, resolutions.

The Most Meaningful Gift to Give Yourself Right Now

by Courtney Carver

There’s a lot of talk about what we should and should not be buying or doing over the holidays. By now though, we are in it. We’ve decided who we are going to spend time with and how we are going to engage in the holiday season. The extra shoulds and shouldn’ts and any other simplicity shaming can stop now.

Sure … you can still pull back, make subtle shifts and engage differently, but for me, letting go and getting all holiday-ish on the inside and the outside feels like the next best step. You know what’s best for you and I’m guessing that it’s not feeling guilty about not being simple enough or not doing simplicity right. The process of simplifying my life, and especially simplifying the holiday season took me years. I’m still working on it a little bit each day and grateful I’ve taken so long and done it in a way that feels right to me.

The most meaningful gift to give yourself right now

If you are trying to figure out what’s best for you or what the next best step to take is, here is the most meaningful gift you can give to yourself right now.

Five minutes: Carve out five minutes each day to sit quietly and ask yourself, to ask your heart the following questions.

What matters most today?
How do I really want to spend my time?
What do I need to do to take really good care of myself and the people I love today?

It might help to put your hands on your heart while asking these questions.

Even if you can’t fully live your answers yet, hearing them is going to make a difference. If there isn’t an answer, that’s ok too. Keep showing up for five minutes and asking these questions.

Even with this small commitment of time …

you will have more clarity on when to say yes, and when to say no.
you will feel less pressured by the shoulds or by what other people expect.
you will smile more knowing that who you are is much more important than what you cross off your to-do list.

Try it for a day or two and if you like what you are experiencing, commit to five minutes a day through the end of the year. At the end of the year, if you’ve learned something about yourself, felt a little more peaceful, noticed that your days aren’t as crazy or if others notice a positive change in you, consider turning your holiday practice into a daily heart practice.

How to Create a Simple Closet For The New Year

by Courtney Carver

If you want to cultivate more peace and ease in the new year (and all year long), I recommend starting with a simple closet. It might not sound like a logical recommendation but if what you are doing now to create peace and ease isn’t working, why not try something that sounds a little crazy?

Speaking of a little crazy, I started dressing with 33 items or less including clothes, accessories, jewelry and shoes (yep, shoes too) every three months almost ten years ago. As I result, I created space in my home, time in my life and lots and lots of peace and ease.

The peace and ease of a simple closet comes from …

Noticing a bunch of space in my closet, not a bunch of stuff.
Not spending time in dressing rooms or returning things online.
Getting dressed in the morning without deciding from lots of options.
Not being worried about spending too much money on stuff I don’t wear.
Wearing my favorite clothes every day.

If you’d like some of this peace and ease too, start the new year with minimalist fashion challenge Project 333

Here’s how to get started …

Use a blank piece of paper or the numbered page in the Mini Minimalist Fashion Guide (available with book or tour pre-order) and write down the things you use frequently. For me that list includes: black pants, tee, sweater, sneakers, tote, sunglasses.
Next, list the rest of your 33 items considering how you will work and live for the next three months. This is kind of like creating a budget. You may have to make adjustments at first.
Remove everything else from your closet, box it up and get it out of sight. This is a big step in the “peace and ease” department.

Maybe it’s not so crazy after all

Just like that, you now have a simple closet for the next three months!

Some of you may be thinking, “Yay! Great!” but most of you are probably thinking, “Wait. What?”

I skipped a few steps about how to decide what to include, how to deal with your fears around weather, laundry and what other people may think and a few other things too.

I promise to address all of that in the book and by answering your questions. I want to assure you that if you decide to take on the challenge, you’ll not only have more peace and ease, but you will know yourself better. You’ll know more about what you want and need in your closet. And more importantly, what you want and need in your life. As an added bonus, you’ll enjoy these seven perks of a minimalist wardrobe.

Through challenges like Project 333, and doing other things that “sound crazy,” I’ve learned to stop judging based on my fears and assumptions. Instead, I try things and learn what’s best for me and my life based on my own experiences. Most of what’s improved my health, home and relationships turned out not to be that crazy after all.

Thanks to this minimalist fashion experiment, I’m always willing to answer the question, “Wouldn’t it be crazy if … ?

If you are ready to jump in, great! If you need more information, feel free to search around bemorewithless.com for “Project 333” and join the new Project 333 community on Instagram. I’ll be sharing my winter wardrobe there and will do a live call before the end of the year to answer your questions.

The Project 333 Book AND Tour

Let’s spend time together in your city or virtually. In less than three months, Project 333, The Minimalist Fashion Challenge That Proves Less Really is So Much More will be out in the world! I’ll be visiting at least 16 cities (some with special guests) next year and hope you’ll join me.

You can learn more about cities, guests, the book and some fun pre-order bonuses (like the mini-minimalist fashion guide shown above) by visiting the book page here.

Weekend Favorites: simple advice, social anxiety and lights

by Courtney Carver

Weekend Wisdom: Paying attention to people you love is 2% effort and 98% not looking at your phone.

Last weekend I told you about Soul & Wit, the new podcast I started with my daughter Bailey. We had such a fun launch week! The podcast topped the iTunes charts in the Health & Fitness, Self-Improvement and Education categories.

Thanks to all of you who tuned in, we were even ranked in the top 150 of ALL podcasts (for a very brief but exciting time). Listen to the latest episode, Less Stress if you want less stress in your life.

One night, earlier this week, I took a city-stroll with my husband to enjoy the lights. It’s one of my favorite holiday traditions.

Ok … onto the favorites.

This short, simple advice solves so many problems.

This time last year, I wrote this.

This is what happens to the stuff you donate.

I’ve never had an article “go viral” until this one went absolutely bonkers last week.

Do these five things when social anxiety has your tongue.

A Buddhist teacher offers five simple steps to quiet your mind and soothe your stress any time of year. (NYT)

Tickets are now available for the Project 333 Book Tour (and I have big news coming for you NYC). If I’m not visiting your city, check out the virtual tour along with all of the pre-order goodies.

The Soul & Wit Podcast is now on Spotify!

These are the songs I listened to most in 2019.

And my Instagram fav of the week goes to @lizandmollie. A good thing to remember at your next holiday gathering.

I hope you enjoy this edition of Weekend Favorites and have a beautiful weekend.

xo,

Courtney

How to Fill Your Life with Simplicity, Joy and Love

by Courtney Carver

After what might be an overwhelming holiday season, the last thing you want to fill your new year with is more commitments, stress and stuff. Instead, intentionally set out to create a new year full of what matters to you instead.

We all look forward to new beginnings in a new year but use these recommendations all year long. You can begin to fill your life with simplicity, joy and love anytime.

If we aren’t thoughtful about what we put in our homes, on our calendars and in our lives, we can easily slide into default mode, reacting to whatever is thrown our way. This often leads to overwhelm, frustration and decision fatigue.

How to Fill Your Life with Simplicity, Joy and Love

1. Soulful Simplicity Course
If you are ready to work on you … your heart, your mind and your mental and physical health, join me for six weeks. We’ll work on on making you, making space and making time in this video course including audio and written transcripts, downloadable worksheets, live calls, and a supportive community.

The course starts on January 13, but sign up before the end of the year for discounted membership and an invitation to join me on December 30th for a live call on how to let go of 2019 to fully welcome 2020. Learn more here.

2. The Soul & Wit Podcast
Your new favorite mother-daughter duo talking about things (that aren’t things) together and with special guests. Join Courtney Carver and Bailey Carver talking about simplicity, wellness, happiness and secrets to living a life you love. Plus, we’ll be interviewing amazing humans about how to live a meaningful life. New episodes come out every Monday. Let us send you into your week with a little Soul & Wit. Listen on iTunes or Spotify.

3. Clear Boundaries
We often think of boundaries as harsh or mean, but they are kind. Boundaries aren’t designed to shut others out, but instead, when you set a boundary, you are giving yourself permission to take care of yourself.

When you set and honor your boundaries, you are saying …

I am important to me.

I am important to my loved ones.

Taking care of myself matters.

You can’t please everyone. You just can’t.

You may have noticed that when you try to make everyone happy all the time, the only result is burnout and even more disappointment. If you need to set boundaries for your own mental and/or physical wellbeing, do it. Don’t worry about who you might upset. That part isn’t up to you.

Eventually, everyone will benefit from you taking really good care of yourself.

4. Linger longer.
Lingering is like falling in love. Think about the evenings when you’ve sat around a table after a meal, talking and laughing instead of rushing to clean up the dishes. You fell in love with the people around you and the evening you shared. Likewise, lingering over a sunrise, a good book, a long walk, or a moment of solitude encourages love; love of what you are experiencing, love of who you are spending time with, and love of who you are.

5. Permission to unthink
Why do we believe everything we think? Get unstuck by giving yourself permission to unthink your thoughts. Notice your thoughts but don’t let them run your life.

6. Join me on tour
Spend time with like-hearted people IRL (in real life) and join me (and special guests) on the Project 333 book tour. See cities, special guests and more here. P.S. If you can’t make one of the live shows, there is a virtual event you can attend from anywhere in the world.

7. Create community
If you don’t have support from friends and family in simplifying your life and adding more joy and love, create or join a community that will support you. You can join me on Instagram or Facebook and look locally for groups that have similar interests.

To generate more interest within your own friend and family circle, instead of trying to convince them, host a movie night and watch Minimalism, A Documentary About the Important Things. They may be more inspired when they hear it from someone else.

8. Say thank you
I’m going to challenge myself to write a thank you note every week next year. I’m silently grateful many times a day and I want to spread that appreciation by writing it down. I plan to mail some of these notes, but also carry a few blank cards with me and leave them behind in my daily travels when I experience something that deserves thanks. Gina Hamadey inspired me by writing 365 thank you notes in 2018. See some of her notes here.

9. Don’t say yes, when your heart says no.
Saying yes while clenching your jaw and rolling your eyes may signal that you are ignoring your heart. Agreeing to do things you don’t want to do, aren’t interested in and that you don’t have time for may allow you to avoid some discomfort in saying no. It also builds tremendous resentment (which eats you up on the inside) and prevents you from doing things you actually want to do.

When your heart says no, you say no. If saying no is hard for you, this will help.

10. Take care of you
You can start here and repeat forever. Please keep taking care of you.

Weekend Favorites: soul & wit, healthy travel, happy children

by Courtney Carver

Weekend Wisdom: Get clear on what matters by getting rid of everything that doesn’t.

We launched our new podcast this week! The reviews are making me smile. Some of you said that it sounds like we’ve been doing this forever. The truth is … we have. Bailey (my podcasting partner) is also my daughter, so we’ve been in conversation for more than 24 years. 😉

Our first five episodes are live on iTunes and will be on Spotify very soon. We’ll be dropping a new episode every Monday so please subscribe for a little Soul & Wit to start your week.

We’ve been working for months to bring you this podcast so if you enjoy it, please subscribe, rate and review. I know it’s a big ask on our part but it makes a big difference to the long term success of the show. We’ll keep making it if you keep loving it. We are really grateful for your interest, attention and support.

Ok … onto the favorites.

We are giving away STACKS of our favorite books right here.

Even though I’ve reduced my gift giving significantly as I’ve simplified my life, I am just about ready to give it up completely. Melissa is inspiring me.

These keys to happiness for 2019 will certainly apply to 2020 too.

Putting together a multi-city tour takes time and lots of help! Tickets are now available for almost all of the cities I’m visiting next spring (and if there is enough interest, I may add Philadelphia). If I’m not visiting your city, check out the virtual tour!

A soft and sweet holiday playlist for you.

Thinking about all the travel I have coming up in 2020 sent me in search of my Gentle Warrior’s Guide to Healthy Travel.

My friend Heidi shared this article about what we’ve learned about stress relief in 2019 in her Friday Faves email and I had to re-share these four awesome recommendations.

Lots of presents under the tree may make your children less happy according to science.

And my Instagram fav of the week goes to @shinetext. We need this simple reminder.

I hope you enjoy this edition of Weekend Favorites and have a beautiful weekend.

xo,

Courtney

Soul & Wit: Our New Podcast

by Courtney Carver

I woke up at 5:00 this morning bursting with energy (and joy and fear) because I could not wait to tell you this.

Soul and Wit Podcast

My daughter Bailey and I made a podcast and the first five episodes are ready for you right here. I’m delighted to share these conversations with you.

How to listen to the Soul and Wit Podcast

We are live on iTunes with a trailer and the first five episodes including …

1. How to Simplify Your Life

2. Create a Morning Routine (including tips for parents of young children)

3. Interview with Jen Pastiloff (Author of On Being Human)

4. We Love New York

5. Books. Books. Books. (book giveaway coming later today on @soulandwitpodcast on Instagram)

Help us celebrate!

We made this new thing! We didn’t know what we were doing at first. Things weren’t perfect. We figured out what we could on our own. We asked for help. We spent hours recording, editing out fits of laughter, planning, designing, and editing out more fits of laughter and mixed up words. We are having a blast and hope we bring a sense of joy and ease to your ears.

I told you I wanted to create more fun in my work, and partnering with my daughter on this new podcast was the best way to do that. This podcast has been such a fun new adventure for both of us and we are so happy we finally get to invite you to listen.

Please help us celebrate and let us know if you want more of our voices on your walks, with your morning coffee and other times you listen to podcasts by subscribing to the new podcast and rating/reviewing. I know it takes a little bit of extra time but it really helps especially when you are just getting started like we are. If you have questions, topic suggestions, or feedback, you are always welcome to email or DM on Instagram too.

We will be available all places you listen to podcasts in the coming days and have a brand new episode launching Monday and most Mondays after that. We look forward to sending you into your week with a little Soul & Wit.

7 Simple and Healthy Ways to Brighten Your Morning

by Courtney Carver

A morning routine will help you simplify your day and brighten your morning. Starting your day intentionally with things that make you smile and slow down may be even more powerful than a strong cup of coffee.

Here are some of the benefits you can expect from a consistent morning routine.

Focus
You’ll feel less scattered and more focused all day long when you give yourself time first thing to settle into the day. While it all contributes, the meditation component of my morning routine helps me come back more quickly when I do get distracted.

Creativity
Not only will you be more creative throughout the day, when you are practicing your morning routine with an open heart and mind, creative ideas seem to drop out of the sky. So much of my book and blog writing starts on the yoga mat or while journaling or walking.

Patience
Learning to under-react is one of the best parts of the morning routine effect. You’ll learn to pause, to consider your words and to remember not to believe everything you think.

Priority
A morning routine will help you understand what matters and just as important, what doesn’t. You can apply what you are learning to your to-do list, your day and your life.

Fuel
A meaningful morning routine can fuel your heart, soul, body and brain depending on the activities you choose. You can fuel up with food too by including a healthy breakfast at the end of your morning routine.

Connection
Your morning routine will help you become more of the real you. The connection you are making with your own heart will encourage connections with the people you are meant to be with. The more you that you are, the more likely you are to attract the right people for you.

Next week, you can hear more about my morning routine on the new podcast, Soul & Wit that I created with my daughter Bailey. Subscribe now and listen to the trailer. Later this week, we are sharing five episodes including one all about morning routines.

My morning routine changes with the seasons. Right now, it’s cold and dark when I wake up, so my focus is on things that will brighten my morning. I want to feel ready to enjoy my day instead of wanting to crawl back under the covers.

7 Simple and Healthy Ways to Brighten Your Morning

1. Drink water with fresh squeezed lemon juice. My first drink of the day is 16 oz. of water and lemon juice. It wakes me up from the inside out. Hydrating first thing is a great way to brighten up.

2. Move your body. Take a walk or stretch out. I like moving with Yoga with Adriene.

3. Sit still. Once my body is warmed up, I sit quietly in meditation for 20 minutes. If meditation isn’t for you, try simply sitting still and paying attention to your breath.

4. Put your hands on your heart. For a few seconds, or a few minutes, place your hands on your heart. We do a deep dive into this powerful heart practice in the Soulful Simplicity course.

5. Write something. Write in a journal, make a list, or jot down some thoughtful words in a thank you note. Move some of the things on your mind to paper. Here are some journaling prompts to help.

6. Call someone you love. Start your morning with connection by calling someone you love.

7. Let go. Think about what’s holding you back from enjoying your day. Is it clutter in your kitchen or a story you are telling yourself? What do you need to do to let it go and enjoy your day?

If you don’t have a morning routine, start with two of these recommendations and add in others as you build the habit of starting your day with intention.

P.S. The Soulful Simplicity Course begins on January 13th. If you sign up this month, join me for a live call on December 30th about how to thoughtfully close out 2019 to make room for everything you want in 2020.

Weekend Favorites: newborns, true belonging and angels

by Courtney Carver

My favorite weekend plans are no plans at all.

Weekend Wisdom: I can’t remember where I heard this, but it makes me smile … Beds are just wireless chargers for humans.

I’ve been up in Park City, Utah for the Thanksgiving holiday and it’s as if we’ve been staying in a snow globe. It just keeps snowing and snowing and snowing.

Ok … onto the favorites.

If you are new to Weekend Favorites and want to check out prior episodes, try this one or this one.

These newborns dressed as Mister Rogers are making it a beautiful day in the neighborhood.

My friend Jules wrote an e-cookbook called The Simple Joy of 6-Ingredient Suppers and she wants you to have it for free. You can click here to download.

Two holiday albums I’ll be listening to this weekend: this one and this one.

While I love all of these definitions, the way Brené Brown describes “True belonging” resonates deeply.

Will I meet you in one of my 2020 tour stop cities?

The escalator scene from Elf will always be my favorite thing.

Maybe our obsession with healthy eating is overrated. Here’s what the oldest people in the world eat.

And my Instagram fav of the week goes to @subliming.jpg with encouragement to trust yourself.

I hope you enjoy this edition of Weekend Favorites and have a beautiful weekend.

xo,

Courtney

P.S. 31 Days of Gifts You So Deserve starts this Sunday! Join on your own or gift to your family, friends, or co-workers.

When Grace and Gratitude Come First

by Courtney Carver

It’s interesting how we have to be intentional about practicing grace and gratitude, but stress, busyness and frustration are second nature.

We are pros at reacting to all the things life throws at us, drilling through our never-ending to-do lists, skipping lunch, sacrificing sleep and taking care of ourselves in the pursuit of more. But more of what? And to what end?

What would happen if grace and gratitude came first?

What if we felt …

grace when dealing with uncertainty
gratitude before we were stressed or frustrated
hopeful while dealing with loss
loved before judged
loving before judging

Everything I read suggests grace and gratitude as a solution to stress, frustration and overwhelm but if grace and gratitude come first, we can avoid some of the stress or at least navigate it in a healthier way. Instead of using grace and gratitude as tools to solve problems, let’s start from a place of grace and gratitude.

The research on gratitude is fascinating.

If you want to see if grace and gratitude can soften or eliminate some of the craziness of your life, try it.

Here are a few ways to put grace and gratitude first …

Say thank you first.
Let your first thought of the day be one of gratitude. What are you grateful for when you open your eyes? Think about it for 30 seconds before jumping out of bed. Write it down or say it out loud.

Stop measuring who you are by what you accomplish.
Grace measures more by what’s on your heart than what’s on your list. When you are stressing over your calendar or to-do list and telling yourself you are falling behind, remember who you are and what you mean to the people around you. Remember what really matters to you. Trust what’s in your heart.

Laugh more.
Laughing is grace and gratitude all wrapped into one joyful expression. Laugh more. Life is serious enough without us trying to keep it all together all day long.

Start with you.
The more loving you are with yourself, the more loving you can be with everyone around you. The more grateful you are for who you are, what’s on the inside and what you have to offer, the more grateful you can be for the stuff on the outside. The more grace you extend to yourself, the more you’ll have to extend to others.

Let go. Let go. Let go.
All of this holding on to stuff that doesn’t really matter gets in the way of grace and gratitude. From physical clutter and stuff, to things we think we should believe or should do, to what we think others think – it’s all messy. Keep letting go of anything standing in the way of more grace and gratitude in your life.

Here’s the thing … we can work to simplify our lives, take better care of ourselves, and reduce stress but some things are not in our control. There will always be surprises, uncertainty, difficult people, loss, and failure. With a reserve of grace and gratitude, we’ll get through the hard stuff and come out stronger on the other side.

And the good stuff will be even sweeter.

Weekend Favorites: holiday clutter, defining values and apple crisp

by Courtney Carver

Excited for a cozy weekend!

Weekend Wisdom: Feeling guilty for taking care of yourself is not taking care of yourself.

I’ve been hinting that things were going to get a little crazy around here, and they have. Not in a bad way, just in a more than usual way. Most of the new offerings I’m going to share with you below have been in the works for years. They just all happen to be available all at once and I’m hoping that sharing them all in one place will add a little clarity.

This is what my work space looked like this week.

Before sharing more, I want to say thank you. Whether you decide to join one of my programs, pre-order my new book or not, I’m very grateful that you subscribed to hear from me on a regular basis. Your notes of encouragement and questions and thoughtfulness mean a lot to me not just as a writer/blogger, but as a human being. Your support makes a difference in my life and I appreciate you.

I’ve got the BEST favorites for you this week! Is “best favorites” a thing? Well if it is, they are coming your way, but first let me tell you about everything that’s going on. If you aren’t interested, feel free to skip down to the favorites.

Current offerings and how best to take advantage of them, if you are interested.

31 Days of Gifts You So Deserve – This Advent calendar for your inbox begins on December 1st. Join on your own or send gifts to your family, friends, or co-workers. We’ve had book clubs, church groups and families from all over the world participate.

Soulful Simplicity Course – The six-week guided video course starts in January but if you join before the end of the year, it’s $99 instead of $129 and there’s an opportunity for an additional $20 off (see below). Additionally, if you join early, you can attend bonus live calls with me on December 3rd and 30th!

New Project 333 Book & Tour – We just launched the pre-order campaign and book tour for Project 333, The Minimalist Fashion Challenge That Proves Less Really is So Much More. If you pre-order the book you qualify for some fun pre-order bonuses including …

$20 off the Soulful Simplicity Course
Free membership for the new Project 333 course (coming March 2020)
Access to the virtual tour (from anywhere in the world). If I’m not coming to your city on the book tour, pre-order the book and join the virtual tour and I’ll mail you a signed bookplate and fun Project 333 stickers.

See these bonuses and others here.

New Instagram Account: Unlike my current Instagram account, the new Project 333 account will be all about closets, capsule wardrobes, Project 333 and people from all over the world taking the challenge. If you are looking for Project 333 inspiration, this is the place.

New Podcast: We are launching sometime in the next two weeks!! If you want to be the first to see the name, check it out on Instagram.

Like I said … more than usual! I’m looking forward to connecting with more of you in your cities on book tour, during the virtual tour or other live calls. And of course, you can always email or DM on Instagram.

Ok … onto the favorites.

10 Better Ways to Do Black Friday.

Raise a dog with sheep and it will love sheep. Raise a dog with goats and it will love goats. Raise a dog with people … you know the rest. Dog’s can’t help falling in love. (NYT)

This quote by “The Snowflake Man” on the importance of beauty and gratitude.

I was going to wait until December to start listening to holiday music, but this playlist has been my morning music all week.

You’ll like this audio recording of my article, “Avoid Holiday Overwhelm by Saying No to Almost Everything” from my friends at Optimal Living Daily Podcast.

#9 is my favorite on this list of 10 tips for cutting down on clutter this holiday season.

If you’d like to better understand your values and align your actions to your values, grab this free worksheet.

6 ways to reduce screen time is a video most of us can benefit from.

I’m making this apple crisp recipe for Thanksgiving.

And my Instagram fav of the week goes to @selfcareisapriority. If you visit the image, you’ll see a description of what your job really is.

I hope you enjoy this edition of Weekend Favorites and have a beautiful weekend.

xo,

Courtney

P.S. If you are new to Weekend Favorites and want to check out prior episodes, try this one or this one.